Sunday, May 3, 2009

The Cinderella Rant

Where to begin...!?! "Once upon a time".... a little too cliche...
It's all a matter of perspective really. I know I'm not the only one who has ever thought about finding their soul mate or "the one". (Not referring to Neo and the Matrix, but rather the love of one's life.)

The other day I was having a conversation concerning matters of the heart with one of my closest friends. My friend told me that there could be many right women for me to be married to and that if in dating any particular relationship did not work out with one, that there are others who could be the one. (Whew, good thing because I have no desire to get back with my ex-wife!!!)

This one goes out to anyone who has looked for their One and particularly those who are still looking! I can't speak for all of us, but I would like to clarify what I think many of us mean to say by finding, "The One". I think it could mean the person who we will end up with, and have to share our lives with, raise a family, and or grow old together; in a monogamous and fulfilling marriage. This search for acceptance and receiving love as well as giving our love in return in an individual's life; to me can be compared to the story of Cinderella. In my story, I play the prince trying to find a wife. In the real story the prince falls in love with a mysterious and enchanting girl at the ball, who has to leave suddenly and leaves nothing by which the prince can find her, except a glass slipper that falls off her foot during her prompt exit from the ball.
(She gives him no email address, no phone number, no not even so much as ask him for his! She just bails out on him.) The slipper can be the symbol for the qualities the prince needs and wants in his future queen. He then sets out on a quest throughout the kingdom to find the foot of the young maiden to whom the glass slipper will fit. (I wonder if the author of that story had some kind of foot-fetish.)
Another representation of the glass slipper can be the heart. By leaving the slipper behind, Cinderella gave the prince her heart. And in his quest to find the owner of the slipper, to identify the girl to whom the shoe fits, the girl of his dreams; Prince Charming is looking to see with whose love can fit his heart/ the slipper.

I have one major problem with this story and that is that Cinderella just bails on him at the first sign of trouble and worried about pleasing her family. If she bails on him like she did at the ball, and she is more worried about her step mom's wants than what her husband's feelings, what kind of marriage would that be? When the honeymoon is over and the stuff hits the fan, will she hit the road?

How can anyone overlook the fact that the prince fell in love with her during a couple of slow dances, maybe a few waltzes...!?! Come on dude! Even the kids down in Provo think that is too fast! (Except the ones who get revelation about it on the first date.) Yeah, I used to be like the masses and criticize the television program The Bachelor (It has poor sound so make sure you turn up the volume), that is until I realized the show takes up an entire tv season, and who knows how long that takes to film? However long it is, I'm sure it is a longer courtship than Prince Charming's and Cindarelly's or that of my failed marriage/ a topic for another time. I wish I could shout at him with the voice of an Angel that could shake the earth, "Wake up before you end up living in a nightmare as you lose half your kingdom in divorce court." Think of the children....

Another point to mention is that there may have been more than one maiden in the kingdom with the same size foot. Wouldn't that be a problem? And furthermore, if the shoe fit Cinderella's foot so perfectly, why then did it "slip off her foot"? Maybe that's what our friends mean when they say there could be more than one "soul mate" or "the one"; as the slipper may fit more than one girl.

"The one", could also mean the girl in the end; the metophoric "Cinderella", whom the slipper fits beautifully and "Prince Charming" can represent the one who can reciprocate what has already been mentioned. Maybe even looking past what is on her outside; a poor stepdaughter/ house maid.

The morale of the story is to treat others' hearts as what they can be: a precious and delicate object made of glass even. Handle other people's hearts as you want your heart to be handled. Take your time when deciding on "The One". Also to consider: Is there more to them than just what's on the outside? Is he also a prince on the inside? Is she just a common house maid on the outside?
NEXT TIME: Was Cinderella just a gold digger?

William Shakespeare
Go to your bosom; knock there, and ask your heart what it doth know…

Blaise Pascal
The heart has reasons, which the reason cannot understand.

Wizard of Oz
Hearts will never be practical until they are made unbreakable...

Lao Tzu
Love is of all passions the strongest, for it attacks simultaneously the head, the heart and the senses.

Kahlil Gibran
Beauty is not in the face; Beauty is a light in the heart.

Herbert Trench
Come, let us make love deathless.

Jessie B. Rittenhouse
My debt to you, Beloved,
Is one I cannot pay
In any coin of any realm
On any reckoning day.

If I had a rose for every time I thought of you, I'd walk through a garden forever.


Wherever you go, go with all your heart.

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